How do I control my emotions?

I got out of an abusive relationship about two years ago, but I still feel the anger and pain. It wont go away! I used to cut and that helped it subside, but because that is unhealthy I stopped. Now I'm so angry and so sad all at once. Rather than cut I write insults about myself allover my arms to " keep my ego in check". I feel like I'm going off the deepend. I don't want to feel like this anymore, I'm drained. Where should I go for help? What do I do?? I understand this is a public forum and many will probably say I'm just crazy... And I understand. It is crazy. I want my normal brain back...this is awful.